Yuck.

Sorry for the lack of posts this week. It hasn't been a good few days. It's done nothing but rain and I have a horrendous cold which caused me to miss 1.5 days o'school. Bad idea. Because my school is only 10 months, the teachers fly through everything, and it's really difficult when you miss a class. Honestly, I thought my days of sitting in a classroom on the verge of tears were over, but no.

Today was also filled with fun "Are you kidding me?" bad day incidents: my teacher actually typed "Saxon is sick and should go home" in PHP code on the overhead projector. Admittedly, I was "that guy" in class -- coughing, sniffling, fumbling for tissues. I ended up leaving early, when my Bea Arthur voice gave out and I broke down into non-stop coughing.

Then, while waiting at the bus stop, it arrived and stopped 20 feet up from the official stop to let people out - I thought, "Weird, but so what! I'll be first!" So I approached it, only to have the bus driver close the doors on me and drive 20 feet to the actual bus stop, forcing me to walk back to my original position, and wind up in the back of the line. Then, right in front of our house, I walked through wet cement. Come ON. It'll serve as a reminder of this day, right alongside the Van Halen logo and I.P + S.F.D = TLA / BFF.

Thanks to Iain for comforting me and reminding me of my days working for Mr. Pitt -- nothing is ever that bad.

Tomorrow is Friday and will hopefully mark the return of more interesting, positive posts. Unlikely!

No, really, I have a bunch of pictures from our weekend in Dunedin to post and all...

Happy Anniversary, Pete & Zeke!

Our friends in Christchurch (the ones with the vineyard, chickens and kitties) celebrate their anniversary today!

speaking of death

What kind of person STEALS the gravestone off Ian Curtis' grave in Macclesfield? Maybe the same punk who thought it would be cool to steal Kurt Cobain's ashes.

death becomes her

No posts this week -- I've contracted the worst head cold EVER and am staying home from school while Iain brings me tea and soup in exchange for self-pitying moans and handfuls of used Kleenex.

This is the thanks I get for popping vitamins, frantically washing my hands and using hand sanitizer wherever necessary. It doesn't do any good. I might as well lick the bus seats and wash my hands in the airplane toilet - I'm going get sick anyway!

More posts when I'm feeling better.

Thank god for cold & flu tablets and back-to-back downloaded episodes of Gossip Girl! Ed Westwick is hot.

Happy Birthday Sue!

Happy Birthday Liz!

Visiting the Fam'

This morning we're taking a day off from school and work and flying to the South Island to Iain's hometown, Dunedin. This month was Iain's 40th, his Mom's 70th, and his parents' 50th anniversary.

We'll both be offline for a few days as we chill out with family, although Iain made the suggestion, "Hey, maybe I'll watch the rugby game with my Dad and you can finish your PHP tutorials!" Yeah, right.

WWJD?

I love iTunes. I download television shows, audiobooks, podcasts, and music all the time. Audiobooks and podcasts are especially awesome for long bus rides and exercise. So I was really psyched to see a new audiobook called 'The Shack" advertised for an introductory rate of $5.95. I read the plot synopsis -- it's about a girl who gets abducted by a serial killer. PERFECT. The summary goes on to say that the girl's father receives a mysterious letter one day -- supposedly from God, and "walks back into his darkest nightmare". SOLD!

I download it.

I listen to the first hour.

It's a God book. It's a total Christian book. God, Jesus, the holy trinity, creation, praying... the whole bit. It's all about forgiveness, I suppose. Whatever. I feel totally cheated. But what's the most upsetting is that I'm still listening to it. Not because I'm totally digging the fictitious dialogue between the dad and God (which has been going on for over 2 hours now...), but because it's better than just sitting on the bus with nothing to listen to. Amen.

This isn't the first time I've been duped. Last year I grabbed a book from the library that was actually a God book disguised as a thriller. Like "The Shack", once I started I felt compelled to finish, even though I spent most of the book sighing heavily and rolling my eyes.

Weber Circus

Some circus called Weber Circus is coming to town and they're advertising it through the use of terrifying house-sized blow-up clowns and peculiar posters featuring an offensive picture of a buck-toothed Asian guy, excuse me, an Acrobat of the Orient. It's not Mickey Rooney in Breakfast at Tiffany's racist, but considering Auckland is like 50% Asian, this probably isn't going to do much for ticket sales.



What's interesting is that when we were in Sicily in 2005, they had posters for the same circus but they were these gorgeous, elaborately done illustrations of huge, roaring tigers leaping through flaming hoops and voluptuous women in beautiful spangled circus/stripper outfits. They were incredible. Way better than this crap.

Happy Birthday Justin!

Happy Birthday Hannah!

I love this picture - it's from Thanksgiving at Shelby's like 3 years ago.

Tuesday Geeks

Overheard convo:

"Wouldn't it be cool to design an e-commerce site that charges you higher prices if you're not using Firefox 3? Like, like, if you're using IE6..."

"No one uses IE6 anymore!"

"Some people do - I think my friend's Mom does. So like you're buying something and you're on Safari or IE6..."

"Safari is Mac! Macs suck!"

"Only Safari sucks. Not Mac."

"What if you used LINUX!!" (all geeks erupt in hysterics)

"Yeah, so you charge people MORE and then you'd program a prompt to come up at the end that says, um, that says, 'You paid ten dollars ninety for this because you don't have Firefox 3!'"

Exasperated teacher breaks in, explains how punishing customers generally doesn't work, then asks the following: "What do you want spend your time doing? Earning money or getting people to switch browsers?" Geek pauses, starts laughing, and says, "BOTH!"

Discipline!

Iain left for his fishing trip yesterday morning. He'd been gone only 20 minutes when I heard the unmistakable sound of paws on a counter (or bench, as they say over here). Sure enough, Tama's up on the counter and didn't even seem fazed when he saw me. I guess it's clear who disciplines the kids in this house.

Iain's Birthday Weekend part 2

On Sunday we drove to the swanky suburb of Parnell for a late lunch/dinner at what has been called the best Italian restaurant in Auckland. We soon learned that "the best Italian restaurant in Auckland" is like saying "the best sushi in Oklahoma City" -- it's not much of a claim.

We should have known the place would suck just by looking at their horribly designed website:

http://www.nonsolopizza.co.nz/

It's worth checking out, just for the cheesy 80s art deco theme that has NOTHING to do with the restaurant, the difficult to read fonts, and the annoying flyouts when all you're looking for are their hours or the dinner menu.

Also, the actual menu, like the menu online, is totally annoying and overdone. It's a BOOK. It's got at least 20 pages in hardcover book form with tabs -- TABS. Gimme a break. Just put it all on one big piece of paper already. It was so irritating: "So Iain, I'm looking at the entreés right now -- um, I think it's Tab 4, two pages in. The wine list is tab 7, three pages in after cocktails."

The environment was nice. They had a big fire going which was such a treat because most places this time of year barely have heat, so we've been dressing in 2-3 layers in anticipation of freezing to death. Our server was really nice and 100% Italian. Encouraging.

We ordered a bottle of wine and the beef carpaccio. Puke. It was like someone took some leftover cold roast beef and threw it on the plate. It came with fried artichoke hearts that were incredible -- they should've been their own appetizer.


Then we had arrancini (rice balls) and cauliflower & artichoke fritters, and a wild mushroom dish. The mushrooms were just portobellas doused in balsamic vinegar - they were gross. The fritters were good but how tough is it to screw up something mashed and fried? The rice balls were also good (same theory) but should've come with some marinara sauce or something to dip them in.


Less than thrilled with the food so far, we contemplated leaving. But it was pouring outside, we had our wine, so we took our chances and continued ordering. Iain's tagliatelle with duck ragu could've been dog food or chicken or tofurkey. It was watery and tasted like nothing. I'm sure once it cooks longer and reduces down a bit, it would've had potential, but what we were served was below mediocre. I had the beetroot and ricotta ravioli (I tried to make this at home a few months ago without luck) that were delicious BUT were ruined by an oily beet and onion mess that was underneath the pasta. It was like a salsa almost, but of beets, onions, olive oil and WAY too much balsamic.

Our dessert - a rhubarb pannacotta - was fantastic. Figures. It's probably a different chef.

We paid the bill, complimented the server on her great job, and told the manager or hostess lady how disappointed we were with the food. It was obvious that her question, "How was everything?" was rhetorical. She didn't want or care about an honest answer. I don't understand why restaurants don't equip their staff with skills to handle the occasional disgruntled guest. Rather than actually listen to us, or - hey! - take something off of the rather large tab we'd accrued - she gave us a bored look and muttered lame and derogatory explanations like "Well, it's always been a popular dish with other customers" or "Well, the chef makes food with very subtle flavors so maybe you didn't pick up on it..."


We won't be going back. But it was fun otherwise -- it was really nice to hang out together for the day.

¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡ HAPPY 40TH BIRTHDAY, IAIN !!!!!!!!!

Here are some awesome pictures of Iain from the 80s & 90s. (No matter how much I beg, he refuses to grow his hair long again... ) Happy birthday Iain!!

Iain's Birthday Weekend part 1

The birthday celebrations began last night with dinner at Claudine and Glenn's house where Claudine made awesome orange vodka Cosmopolitans and gave Iain a very appropriate pot holder.

Glenn is a detective and was at work covering a homicide -- when he got home, it took every ounce of willpower not to grill him about all the details. I try to remember that 'Law & Order: SVU' is just a TV show, Bensen & Stabler are not real people, and it's not really appropriate to ask about "the 411 on the perp". At one point he reached into his back pocket and removed a pair of unused crime scene latex gloves and I actually gasped. I am such a loser.

Later in the evening the guys were talking about wearing an earpiece to a function (dinner, etc.) so they could hear the rubgy game, and I said, "Oh wait -- someone did that in a movie. Which was it? I'm trying to remember the film... was it Scorsese? Tarantino perhaps? I definitely saw it. I think it was at a funeral. Which actor... Pacino?"

Suddenly Iain busts in with, "Oh! It was Joey! It was on 'Friends'!"

It's so embarassing how many of our cultural references can be traced back to episodes of 'Friends'. I mean, I guess that's better than "According to Jim" or "Two and a Half Men" but still...

Today we're continuing the celebration by having a late lunch/early dinner at an Italian place in Parnell. Tomorrow Iain heads off on his big fishing adventure.

Iain's Birthday Present

Iain turns 40 on Monday and he's treating himself to a 2 day fly-fishing trip to Taupo.

In Philly, two Iain-less days would mean a 2 day bender with my girlfriends, Law & Order: SVU marathons, and big pasta dinners. Sadly, this will not be the case. School comes first. So, substitute girlfriends for geeks, Law & Order with PHP, mySQL and databases, and pasta with - oh wait, pasta! Yeah, I'll definitely do that. And maybe watch some more 'Gossip Girl' if there's time.

Since we arrived in NZ, Iain has wanted to take a few days and fish, so I hope he has fun. Though, when I turn 40, no one is going fishing, unless it's in Fiji!

What would Carrie say?

No euphemisms in New Zealand! Check out this ad for spaying and neutering your cats. Makes you wonder what they call vasectomies. The orange cat looks especially thrilled.

Long week

Not too many posts this week -- I'm learning some difficult stuff in school and Iain's struggling through a report for work, so it's been a pretty busy (read: crappy) week for the both of us.

Beck Concert

I downloaded Beck's new album from iTunes and got an email that reads:

Thank you for pre-ordering Beck's new album, Modern Guilt. Your order makes you eligible to purchase up to four concert tickets for his upcoming tour before they go on sale to the general public. Presale tickets will be available this week.

The iTunes Presale for these shows begins at 10 a.m. (local venue time) on Wednesday, July 16, and ends at 10 p.m. (local venue time) on Thursday, July 17. For the first round of eligible shows, visit Ticketmaster.com. Keep checking this page in the coming weeks for regular updates.

Is anyone interested in this? If so, I'll forward you the email with the code.

Happy Birthday Ileana!

Happy Birthday Julian!

Scenic Reserve

We went for a walk yesterday afternoon in one of the local reserves. It's really cool how they have these everywhere. You feel like you're in the middle of the woods when you're less than a mile from the street. I took a picture of this massive wood pigeon going to town on some leaves. This thing was huge.

The Month of 1000 Birthdays

There's like 800 people we know celebrating birthdays this month, so stay tuned for lots of "Happy Birthday _______" It's weird how these things happen. Growing up, it seemed like all of my friends had birthdays in March or December.

The best news is that Iain turns FORTY this month! There'll be lots of celebrating!

Geeks unite!

It was discovered today that one of my classmate's Apple remote works on all of the desktop computers in our class. Drunk with power, the geek delighted in turning up and down the volume on our computers, while sidekick geeks brainstormed on the immense possibilities this opens up:

"You could go to a Mac convention and, and, um, you could use the remote to turn the volume up really loud on the presenter's laptop!!"

"Dude! You could go to the electronics store and turn the volume up and down when people try out the Macs!! They'd never know what was happening!"

"We should ALL bring in our remotes!"

I haven't seen them this excited since Firefox 3 launched. It was like they discovered that the remote actually controls people.

Happy Birthday Dave

Our friend Dave would've been 39 today.

Brunch!

To recreate the awesome time we had just 2 weeks ago while on vacation, we returned to the Auckland Domain's restaurant for brunch. It was great.

Then we rented early episodes of The Sopranos and had pasta for dinner. Later on, Iain watched a rugby game (S Africa vs NZ) while I watched episodes of 'Gossip Girl' on my laptop.

Today I'm doing homework and Iain's going grocery shopping and working on the house.

Ponsonby & Grey Lynn

After lunch yesterday we drove around some of the swanky neighborhoods. The houses are so cool -- they're all older Kiwi villas that remind me of historic Buffalo (Allentown), North Buffalo, or San Francisco. I took pictures but it was raining so they didn't come out very well - these pictures don't really do them justice. Even though the houses are all really close together and most have little or no backyards,they're all worth at least $1M. Weird. The first building is a really cool Belgian place that serves great mussels and beer.

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY PATEFIELDS!!

Iain's parents celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary today!

From Danielle, responding to billboard:

"I kept staring at the sign - something about it was bothering me. Then I realized the "ironies." Seriously, wouldn't you think that someone would have caught on that it makes no sense to hang a sign that addresses America in New Zealand before they printed it? I kept picturing "America" driving by the sign, reading it, and then slumping down in his seat with a hang dog expression after having been zinged."

"America should post the following sign in Times Square: Hey New Zealand: The jerk stored called. They're running out of you!"

I told you

Like I said, Kiwis REALLY like their coffee. I think this is a jab at Starbucks and all of the closings.

BREAKING NEWS: American products cost less in America!

For the last THREE DAYS the talk in class has been about how expensive the new iPhones are. This has not replaced the daily "Mac versus PC" debates, but it's tempered them somewhat. It's the most inane conversation:

Geek: "The new iPhone is $250 a month after the $399 cost!"
Me: "You'd be an idiot to buy one."
Geek: "I should just go to the States and buy one and bring it back. My friend in Chicago has one!"
Me: "Yeah, but wouldn't you still have the $250 monthly fee?"
Geek: (pause) "Yeah, but it's still cheaper!" (loses interest in me as another student enters the class) "Hey -- did you know that the new iPhone is $250 a month?"

Another convo I had with a classmate:
"I could go to class 7 days a week - I just love it!"

In other class news, Child Genius celebrated his 17th birthday.

Poor Iain

As if it wasn't bad enough having to miss the rugby game on Sunday:

BBC NEWS
Porn appears on rugby programme

New Zealand rugby fans watching a regular sports programme found themselves viewing hardcore pornography instead on Sunday afternoon.

Four minutes of pornography interrupted sports coverage on the Prime Television channel, after what a spokesman described as a distribution mix up.

The pornographic footage was meant for an adult pay-per-view channel.

Instead, it found its way onto a regular free-to-air programme called "Grassroots Rugby".

Rival television channels reported that some viewers were angry about the broadcast, which may have been seen by children.

Story from BBC NEWS:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/go/pr/fr/-/2/hi/also_in_the_news/7493256.stm

Dinner Party

Saturday night we had 4 friends over for dinner. It was a lot of fun. The best thing about dinner parties is that it forces you to really clean your house. Let's just say it had been a while....

I made homemade sangria and our friend Claudine also bought a bottle, with the unfortunate name "Penasol". The more Penasol you drink, the funnier the name gets. (yeah, I know you're supposed to pronounce the "n" like in "pina colada" or "el nino" but it's more fun not to)

There's an old school Kiwi chip dip that Iain made. This stuff is like the best ranch dressing or onion soup mix you've ever had in your life, but with 30x more fat. It's so dangerous. It's made with cream and it RULES.

I meant to take pictures of the actual dinner party, but I totally forgot. Iain cooked a great meal: Asian soup with shrimp, then fish in phyllo pastry and a swiss chard (silverbeet as they say here) and bleu cheese risotto. It kicked ass. I cleaned everything up and set off the dishwasher after the guests left, which wound up being a brilliant move since the power went out the following morning and I wouldn't have been able to clean anything.

BLACKOUT!

We woke up Sunday morning to no electricity. No heat, no microwave, no TV, no internet, no stereo, no laundry. Dependence upon electricity always amazes me -- virtually everything I'd planned to do that day involved power. Iain was supposed to watch the rugby game with our friend Glenn, but realizing he wouldn't be able to immediately dove into various household chores, but I didn't know what to do with myself. At one point, I was just standing in the middle of the kitchen - just standing there, useless, trying to figure out what the hell to do. I opted for a shower by candlelight (a QUICK shower since the hot water heater is electric) and then volunteered to call the power company again (Iain had already tried once and couldn't get through).

I was put on hold for 40 minutes. The on hold music was 60% Crowded House. This was cool at first, but grew old quickly. I mean, come on -- there are other Kiwi bands out there! There are other bands, period!

I finally hung up and Iain said he'd take a turn. Dealing with really nasty customer service reps (Verizon, Comcast, Tivo) has conditioned me to always follow telephone prompts correctly. How many times have you been trying to get through to someone, but you're put in the on hold purgatory? So you call back and press "1" when you should've pressed "2", hoping that'll you'll outsmart the system, only you get some super pissy CSR on the other end telling you that this is the wrong department and they cannot and will not help you. If you're lucky, they'll just transfer you to back to on hold hell, but usually it's a bitchy "You need to hang up and call [insert number you JUST dialed]" Therefore, Iain and I both took turns patiently waiting on hold, entertained by 'Don't Dream It's Over' and 'Locked Out', refusing to press "1" for Electrical or Fire Emergency Only. "But we don't have a fire!!!" I insisted, terrified of what would happen when the CSR found this out. However, by this stage, we'd been without power for almost 4 hours and it was getting scary -- we had no heat and a fridge full of beer, so we took a chance.

Iain ended up getting through to someone immediately who didn't mind that we didn't actually have a fire. He was totally helpful and scheduled someone to come out within 4-6 hours. So, we went for a walk, then came home and enjoyed our blackout with some candles, wine, and Monopoly. We could use the stove, thankfully, so we made dinner. It wound up being SO much fun. At first I was feeling a bit anxious without my laptop ("But what if someone emails me?????"), but I got over it quickly.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GARY!

It's Iain's brother's birthday today!